oh hotarubi, hotarubi...the light of the fireflies that pull ever so hard at my heartstrings. the beauty within dir en
grey's music is not just the fact that the words are really poetic and deep, but that the music really fits. shinya
barely writes anything, and this one is simply fabulous. and kyo helps so much with the lyrics. oh MELT dear MELT. every deg fan should hear hotarubi. and whoever decides that the song isn't really nice shall be clobbered by me. ahhH!!!!! just love the song. hotarubi hotarubi...perhaps my next layout shall be based on it. stop the jrock a while. have something else. or shall I replace the lying from you lyrics on shinya to hotarubi? quite a good idea isn't it. there's
already crawling on totchi so enough linkin park, so I shall have hotarubi on shinya for october. thinking too far ahead.
it's only july. hehheh. but what's new. I was falling behind schedule so badly the last time, so better make up lots for
it now. just in case toward the end of the year I begin to fall behind once more. and now that I seem to go online
nearly every night just to blog, download and do some project work of some sort and chat as well, I might as well do some layouts too. but it takes time. lots of it. need some muse and good inspiration. really.
awwww today was irving's last day. and hey he looks good in dark shirts! should have done so earlier boy. then you
would have looked better. coz actually I still don't quite like his face. hehheh. don't let crystal know. she'll have
my head on a platter next. and his hair is really...never mind.
oh and guess what. I've finished downloading the oh so awful and please don't eat while watching saku PV! and that's
like damn fast yeah?! didn't expect it to find any source on it's own and finish downloading. on the contrary, my very
sickening and infuriating spiderman I is at 97% and rather obviously not complete even though it has been weeks. shall
go watch saku now. may get nightmares. damn. then after that my hotarubi repeat mode shall continue. and I'll come
back to blog some more. I have stuff to put up which I keep forgetting to put up...
everyone here: http://www.ecf.utoronto.ca/~ngn/misc/love.html
this is a fantabulous story which was shared during GP today. I told crys her godfather is twisted. like her. oooh.
like father like daughter huh. hehheh. and we thought that stinky cheese man was bad. haha. this is worse, but even
more cool. but the jack and the beanstalk is ultimate. I think norvin really memorised it that day man. it was so
lame!! gosh audi stop entertaining the big kids in a102 alright? try to keep the 2 year old at home happy.
before I forget, better put this up. the following is the poem I did for the mid year exam. don't ask how much I got
for commenting and criticising it. it wasn't much.
Eggs [Susan Wood]
Morning broke like an egg
on the kitchen floor and I hated
them, too, eggs, how easily they broke
and ran, yellow insides spilling out, oozing
and staining, the flawed
beneath what's beautiful. And I hated
my father, the one cock
in the henhouse, who laid the plate
on the table and made me
eat, who told me not to get up
until I was done, every bite. And I hated
how I gagged and cried, day
after day, until there was no time
left and he'd give in and I'd go off
to school like that, again, hungry.
But why did I hate eggs
so much? Freud, old banty rooster, who knew
a thing or two about such things, might say
I hated my self, hated the egg
growing in secret deep inside my body,
the secret about to be spilled
to the world, and maybe I did.
Or maybe it's the way the egg
repeats itself again and again, a perfect
oval every time, the way I found myself
furious, standing by my own child's bed
holding a belt and hit, and saw her face
dissolve in a yolk. But that doesn't say
enough about why we hoard
our hurts like golden eggs and foolishly
wait for them to hatch, why
we faced each other across the table,
my father and I, and fought
our battles over eggs and never fought
with them, never once picked up
those perfect ovals and sent them singing
back and forth across the room, the spell
broken like shells, until we were
covered with them, our faces golden
and laughing, both of us beautiful and flawed.
isn't it so linkin park??! well I kind of thought it was on the day of exam itself, since my lp craze hadn't died down
yet. the other 2 choices were quite a mess. one was a messy story of 18th century england with lots and lots of people and character analysis, and the other was an excerpt from pygmalion which wasn't included in the filming of My Fair Lady, which means I'm not particularly familiar with it. so I did the angsty and eggy themed poem. and to complete it, here's a lovely picture that avril sent me:
cute isn't it?? I love that picture. and it made me think of this angry poem. and I couldn't stop laughing. really.
it's so cute. anyway that kinda wraps up what I wanted to say today. my cough is back. perhaps it's the air in this
room. last night the same thing happened. sigh. even lydia can tell through the phone that there's something wrong
with me. yes dear I'm sick. well much better already but somehow still sick. so sian. but never mind. at least my
throat doesn't hurt anymore. that's not so bad right? I think it's better that way. I'll rather cough and wheeze
like a nut than have my throat hurt everytime I swallow. it's real hard life. I hope wee khee gets well soon. her
symptoms are like exactly the same as mine. okay better get this uploaded fast and go to sleep!! goodness there's
math test tomorrow and it sucks big time. 3D trigo and differentiation. how bad can life get? real bad. and I'm
going so darned early. thanks to crys. but last minute info works on me anyway. so maybe can get some tips from
my godbrother by going early. he's so nice! come 1 hr earlier to school just to teach us. this is what I call a proper teacher. and he doesn't moan about it. at least for now he isn't moaning. hehheh. he may moan in the years to come but that wouldn't be my problem anymore. or at least I hope not. I don't intend to repeat. really I don't.
enough! go on with the hotarubi! and I miss avril...again.
gonna change layout for index pagee! wee! and the pic's page is going to change...guess who?
and it waits for you...@ 2221
29 July
time to let out. again. I'm like coming online to do absolute rubbish everyday. and now I'm deciding to be a nice girl and
try NOT to call avril so that her daddy won't start targeting her and stopping all phone calls/online sessions/eating
sessions etc. haiz. my throat is not painful anymore but it's terribly ticklish. I've been coughing the whole day. it was
still alright this morning before recess but it just got worse and worse and now I keep like coughing a little here and there. and it doesn't help that I want to sing along to my dir en grey songs. I've kinda revived my thing for deg. and my saku PV is erm downloading pretty well. it's already 62% for one night and that's pretty good. but the only problem is that I'm expecting it to be as gory and ugly as obscure PV so I don't really know why I'm downloading such a good bitrate one. well it isn't as good as the obscure one so perhaps it will be slightly more bearable. but then again, obscure is a pretty long song. so perhaps the bitrate is the same, but the file size is smaller because the song is shorter. darn. the baka.dk people said don't eat when watching. pretty telling. but honestly people shouldn't eat when watching jrocker PVs. especially if the jrock band is one of those real morbid and hard core bands that direct their own PVs and the stories are the total opposite of the fairytale kind you can find in laruku's jiyuu e no shoutai. the song is pretty nice and typical larc but the PV is so larc too! haha. somehow you can tell it's them.
dress alert dress alert. aiyah he has a name. don't worry I don't carry a torch for delon and I don't intend to, but at
the same time I don't intend to tell him that I bother looking at him because he stands a near 90% chance of
becoming a really good looking visual rocker. this kind of thing will knock guys totally of their rockers okay and I
don't intend to push more people into woodbridge. they're running out of space. and NO crystal gary cannot make it.
not just in terms of lookswise, regardless of his potential eyeliner eyes, but seriously that felle CAN'T make it. please
spare me the agony. oh yes his voice is terrible too. but then again we've heard worse, haven't we?
okay crystal you must MUST start a fanclub for your darling genius right? although it's his last day tomorrow and you're
gonna be so sad, but don't mope too much okay. yeah his wife's damn freaking lucky. so now he's smart, he's musically
inclined, and he's rich. go irving. really. crys stop thinking about off limits people. well not that I particularly
have something for non off limits people either. tell me where in singapore can you find a male visual rock fan? I
am still wondering. there are male jrock fans, but the moment they hear the word visual they just freak out. lousy idiots. are guys who look prettier than the most gorgeous lady you've seen freaky? yeah to a certain extent. but so what? at least they aren't gay...really they aren't.............
arrgh shall stop it. actually I'm not quite in the mood to blog really. but I still do because I have a blog and I've decided to keep it and UPkeep it as well. july's archive is just going to be oh so long. I like blog nearly everyday in july and that's like wrong?!
hooked on kyo's voice once more! hotarubi has started! so everyone get seated and listen to his beautiful voice and
think about the oh so sad lyrics that kyo was good at. yeah 'was', because now he tries to write english and it isn't
succeeding. please kyo I beg you, implore you, please stop trying the english until the day you can make it. now you
can't so try your english somewhere else and continue the lyrics in japanese please please please....
oh yah. we lost the debate. shucks.
and it waits for you...@ 0032
28 July
getting hooked onto Machiavellism. really. keep listening to it. the replies on baka.dk were seriously funny. you know I haven't gone to that place for such a long time now...and the lyrics they hear out of the songs are absolutely hilarious. but then again it's thanks to kyo's wonderful pronounciation. the
'hurry up, hurry up, wrist cut show'
ended up sounding like
'kaoru kaoru, it's cashew'
and it really does!! oh my I couldn't stop laughing at first. it simply sounds like that! and the oh so nice kyo kyo kyo
chanting of GDS turns out to be kill kill kill. not very far right? hehheh.
went to the stupid parliament house today. again. okay fine not stupid. at least it wasn't an identical tour of the
place. otherwise I would have made some friends with the walls and pillars. the mock session was super funny. I mean
with debaters being the minister, how do you not get a non- interschool debate setting?? and liane's nose was totally
screwing up on her. she couldn't stop sneezing and had to go to the toilet rather desperately. then the ever enthu
marli suddenly stood up, grabbed the all powerful mace and proceeded to walk liane out. and she wasn't needed to do
that at all! I mean it's informal, and also you don't just bring that mace anywhere. without it parliament can't go
on. but the funniest part was that the 2 of them were trying to get themselves out of the double door by pushing
the long handles in the middle, but unfortunately for them, these doors have a doorknob, and aren't pushed open! they
were like 2 fugitives desperately trying to get out and it was simply hilarious. oh and the more I look at ashley
the cuter I think she is. I mean really cute. at first look she just another rather pretty face. then you realise that
actually she's quite cute. her small and slightly plump frame is damn damn cute. 3 cheers for ash!
what's going to happen tomorrow? the debaters from my class are up against A203 for the dumbest motion ever, or otherwise stated as, there should be a For Her magazine. like oh great. and we're proposition. so there ought to be a FHR? like oh man. isn't cleo and 17 enough yet? yeah I know FHR would be a more explicit and visual thing for girls but like oh sheesh! okay maybe it's me.
and crystal shut up about dress alert. it's getting on my nerves. you know why I even bothered about him in the
first place? it's because he has jrock potential!! other than the eyelashes that is. crys can have her abu bakar
for all I care but hey dress alert has the height, the frame and pretty good potential features to become some sort of kaoru or die to some extent. it's true he isn't born pretty (real pretty) like miyavi or hyde, but with some makeup he can make it. gosh look who's the twisted one??!! but crys started it! she was the one who thought of him in a dress in the first place. and she could imagine it! not that I couldn't, but yeah! like oh crystal crystal what's happened to your brain? must have gotten something wrong from me...
anyways after parliament house excursion we went to raffles city for fun and like just walked around, looking at stuff we wanted but couldn't buy...yeah you know that kind of thing. then we went ALL the way to suntec just to get candy mix from minitoons. so despo for sweets right? and wee khee usually gets 5 dollars plus worth of sweets from that place? oh gosh I couldn't eat that much sugar despite my sweet tooth. ah I just don't really have much for sweets itself. doesn't fill my stomach and gives me gastric symptoms. don't know why I eat them anyway.
better go sleep. it's freakily late. and I was supposed to do my PW. and stupid girl didn't check out how to do
evaluation and decided to do it. and promised clara that she'll do it. haiz. now I'm gonna get ready to be slaughtered by clara tomorrow. like oh great! actually I think fiona will slaughter me more. I haven't really done much you know. I suddenly realise. damn. never mind. shall try to make up with the survey planning.
sleep!!! kaoru kaoru it's cashew!! hahhahahah....
and it waits for you...@ 0112
26 July
I'm sick. so sickening. no that wasn't meant to be funny. I'm really feeling rather horrid now so please don't aggravate me. it doesn't pay. I'm so tired and irritated and everybody's like sick now. first it's wanting, then farhana, then fiona, then clara, then almeida and now me too. wee khee's got cramps, crystal's got a sprained ankle and marli has stitches. is our class like super prone to such stuff or what? goodness. and even avril's falling sick. oh man. everybody.
there was something I wanted to scream about just now but somehow I've forgotten. hmm. I seldom have this kind of thing happening to me. generally I remember stuffs like these that I want to rant about on the blog. must be the stupid sore throat getting to me.
listening to miya's new song now. the second track of ashita genki ni naare. terribly recommended by the people on bye bye reality forums. that site loads real fast and there's good stuff to d/l and the d/l server is more stable. but I still like the style of baka.dk. that's still nicer. and speaking of which, I need an account with photobucket, since angelfire no longer supports free image hosting anymore.
if you ask me, this track, fuminishou no nemurihime is not very miyavi either. just like itoshii hito. miya are you trying out new things like deg?? if you are please don't stray too far. even though I often complain that miyavi's songs are like freaking techno and boring but actually it's quite fun and nice to listen to once in a while. listening to deg's new single, saku. the first track is un-deg again!! oh my. what's happening. it's quite nice actually but it's erm not deg style. the title is really horrifying. the first track is Machiavellism, which is the idiot who wrote the Prince which is linked (horrifyingly) to utopia. oh my like I will never hear the end of it will I? eh...saku seems to sound worse than the first one. I mean it's headbanging alright but not the same. but the chorus is pretty deg though. haiz...haven't heard kyo's voice for quite some time already. waited for this single for quite some time too. and then when it came out I didn't realise. shows how little touch with dir en grey I have left. and the songs are like super short! one is 3 min plus, the other is 2 min plus. I was wondering why the file size was so small. I thought perhaps it was recorded at a smaller bitrate or something. it's 128kbps yet each file is something like 2-3MB only. let's hear G.D.S. I like this track okay. and it's probably pretty long because the file size was something like 7MB.
oh yeah it's freaking long alright. but it's such a techno track. don't ask me why I like it. somehow I do. must be the part where they seem to chant kyo kyo kyo kyo kyo...hehheh. take note: SEEM to chant...yeah I'm so deluded. terrible. I tried other things! I tried so hard...I tried linkin park, I tried muse, I tried some old nu-metal stuffs, even tried BEP (my goodness) and went back to some old chinese songs and all but NOTHING absolutely NOTHING beats jrock. woo hoo! still an avid fan of it. not necessarily dir en grey but also laruku and miyavi and gackt etc. must be their
looks or something. somehow hyde looks better as he gets older. gosh nosebleeddddddddd.......................
okay stuffed tissue up my nose. I realised the other day that my miyavi picture database is incredulously big. I used to be so freakily proud of my hyde database, which has hit nearly 100 to date. my miyavi one is crazier than I thought--it's hit 200 pictures already. and that's after like deleting stuffs from the original set from the huge zip file on haruharu.net.
haiz sister left yesterday, and I couldn't send her off coz I'm sick and was lying in bed pathetically last night. but still
pretty glad I didn't because I cried like shit last night. I remember last time, quite some years ago, sister went for her
first sf retreat, leaving me with an empty room. I slept with mum and cried and cried. my mother was like are you okay? and at first I didn't really know why I was crying. then later my mother asked if I missed my sis or something then I thought yeah I think that's why I'm crying. but of course now I'm much older so I don't cry so much anymore, even though sis has flown far away to Japan. she's there, in hiroshima already and I hope she's having fun.
haha. just went to check out our AHEM elesson that's hosted by victoraJC.net (like ehhh?!!). I thought it would be like a set of slides or something. instead it IS a set of slides, but with poh poh lian's voice recorded with it!! oh my goodness! okay it's like super funny!! okay better go sleep. 12 already...
and it waits for you...@ 2358
23 July
haiz. mood not really good again. and yet once more I don't quite know why. do I pms this easily? perhaps. but usually I don't. in fact I'm normally pretty normal, or even worse than ever (in terms of crappiness) during that time of the month. ah well whatever. it's not as bad as yesterday. yesterday was horrid. not to mention that the computer wasn't exactly cooperating.
mae's group is doing written report draft 2. what are we doing? gppf draft 3?? oh my. I cannot take this. we were so darn fast at first. now it looks like we're doing everything all over again. but it's not as bad as it seems really. although I initially thought it was going to be hell time.
what happened today? let me think. first thing in the morning was an incredible string of announcements and more scolding about jaywalking from lailai. oh yay. you think primary school kids learn how to jaywalk from jc students? think again. maybe their parents do it too. yeah it's true that we ought to take the responsibility and not add to the cause by not jaywalking, but it's unfair to insist that it's all our fault that the primary school and secondary school kids are jaywalking. and if lailai insists that we are stupid, go ahead. please will someone go and look out there and check out how pedestrians in singapore cross the road. somehow they think that they are made of iron and can simply bend and not break. like oh joy, as if that would happen. I mean if you want to jaywalk pleasae look first. I know some kids don't, which is how I scraped my knee in east coast and how avril can get knocked down by some bloody bicycle (like eH??!!).
then math tutorial...hammerhead unhappy again. but not as bad. today's mood is different because he needed to be serious due to the fact that supervisors came to sit in for our class. but so sad. he not very happy these days. haiz. then econs lecture wasn't too bad. monopoly profits are exactly the same as perfect comp so it's not too hard to understand. it's just that I don't quite like poh poh lian. that's all. and jashan dropped a big fat bomb on me on wednesday. she told me that the awful weird accented harsh sounding econs teacher who went through the DRQ
with us (and according to almeida, went and came back with violet) called ms wong, is actually elaine wong's sister!!! oh my! like what happened? elaine wong is so nice...nice to the point where carissa actually 1)studied bio, and 2)studied it for her. and that's so unlike carr...right? but come to think of it, she does resemble elaine wong. oh what a terrible revelation.
recess...GP debate was terrible. I didn't know half of what I was trying to say. we were just so unprepared. and crystal
says that audi laughs like a little boy. and norvin was like no lah...ah well crystal and audi. off limits girl, off limits! people married already stop trying. hahahahhaa. just kidding. then literature went through some real weirdo poet's
weirdo poem, and got back our scripts. like finally. I will type out the poem Eggs here someday, because I'm too lazy
to go get it and type it out now. then pccg was student council investiture...the usual speeches and mutimedia
presentations, blah. we slacked during lunch and talked about some people, like terrorist. again. khairiah ah...
after lunch was lit shakespeare tutorial. and HAHA loser jk got scolded again! finally. well you see this is what
happened. he's the lit rep, so rehana passed him this form for us to sign up to present different scenes from the
book. we were supposed to get into groups of 3 or 4, select a scene we want to do, check the week we are supposed to present the scene analysis, then write down our group members against the week and scene number. but don't know
what happened, he only asked us to tell him the group members' names and didn't tell us that the first presentation was today, until yesterday. now what is the first group going to do man???? so we complained, and he came up with an entire array of excuses. first he claimed he did tell us the date but we didn't hear. then fiona bammed it down by saying that it's impossible for the entire class to have missed hearing that. which is terribly true. you know sometimes I really love fiona because she is so freakingly sharp at times. yeah then he said that he gave the sign up sheet to some girl taking lit as well. so great, now I realise that actually the problem is worse. the sign up sheet never came back to rehana. so rehana asked him who did he pass the sign up sheet to, and he said it was some girl and he 1)doesn't know her name, 2)doesn't know her class. like what shit excuse is that, may I ask? lame like anything. and rehana like screwed up her face and asked him if he had lost the sheet. he said no but honestly speaking, chances are he did. I wouldn't have been surprised. the weirdo actually typed out a soft copy. for what??!! if I were rehana I would have screamed, but luckily for jk rehana's temper is quite mild and she doesn't have an active volcano within her. if it were dr s I tell you we would never see his face on the earth again. not that I would mind anyway. and then either joyce asked wee khee or wee khee asked joyce if she felt a little bad/pity for jk. and they both did.I looked at crystal and she looked back and we were like eh actually both of us got this really sadistic satisfaction outta it all lah...come on sometimes it's high time he got into some sort of trouble for his lousy attitude.
after the cathartic lit session, we went to play touch rugby. and we played until 6 or so. like gosh what's wrong with all of us right? but it was so slow and incredulous that it wasn't that tiring. or so I thought. after I reached home I realised
that actually I'm very hungry, and now I'm feeling the tiredness and leg pains from goodness knows when.
then crys and I accompanied meida to the mobil station because the weather was so nice and meida wanted to walk home. I told her it would rain and it really did! I hope she didn't get too wet. on the way out of school I saw andrew quek again. I seem to see him like everywhere. arrgh. I cannot stand his face you know. it's one of those faces that look so odd that you can't stand it but can't help staring at it to see and understand what's so hateful about it. there's something wrong with it but I can't point out what. when I realise it and attain my enlightenment I shall tell you. I saw him in the canteen already but when I was leaving school I saw him again. gosh. I don't have a radar for him okay, if that's what you're thinking.
speaking of radars. yesterday eewei didn't call and avril's supposedly taking a nap. at this hour. yeah the time now is 2335, so I seriously do not know what shit nap she's taking. haiz my 2 dear friends are simply either too busy or too tired to entertain me. I seldom find people who are willing to entertain or actually know how to entertain me. we're all the same frequency people. it's so hard to find real same frequency people. that's why I'm glad for someone like crys. somehow we're kinda same frequency for nearly everything. so it's not bad right? but I won't see her on the bus for the next week, because she came late today and she has to come early for the next week. sigh. let's hope I run into jae then. hehheh. haven't seen her for a couple of days already.
okay I'd better go sleep. meeting angela for bible study tomorrow at like 9 in the morning and still blogging here. I shall go sleep or I will get this terrible stare from angie if I'm late again.
oh yeah forgot to add. I read the model written report done by our dear seniors in year 2 that helped to trigger the start of paying mcdonalds with our ez-link card. I was right. it's serena's group. I remembered something about mcdonalds that she was saying the other time and vril was like damn excited about it. now I know what. and now I know something else new. andrew quek has some brains after all.
and it waits for you...@ 2347
22 July
what a mess. my pw is changed all over again. okay not really all over again, but some of it got changed. and it's the 3rd draft, as well as the last time we can change and we had to. we were the first group to have their gppf approved. haiz. what ever lah. so tired. today had pe conditioning. stupid circuit. at first I thought that it would rain in the morning then we could do circuit in the hall. at least that would have been better than doing push ups and burpies on the track. my hands hurt like anything after that. I don't fear the sun, unlike some people I know.
yeah speaking of that jk. ha ms k gave him an AE for the SFF. we were like laughing. yeah I know it's real mean but honestly when you look at all the problems he's been giving, it's really amazing how his pw group could stand him, especially sup and jolyn. amazing man. I would have either screamed or slapped him or something. nah not really either. I would have wished to do so but I'm quite a restrained person. don't ruin my own reputation by doing such stuff.
I'm so freaking tired. but I promised wee khee I would come online so that I could help if she needed any with the gppf...oh well. and it doesn't help that stupid avril's msn has signed in by itself again. and yes that means that she is not replying my greetings to her. it's only 2051. eewei's supposed to call at like 2200++...so long more to go. haiz. you know nagor asked me today something like why I'm not with avril. and then I was like huh why should I be, like we are a year apart and my classrooms don't even hit e4. and then she like said something like, "I thought she was like in love with you or something." and guess what I said. I said no lah, she's not in love with me, it's me who's in love with her. like ooooh. I've never told anyone like that before. hehheh. I only told mae that I love avril more than her but eh that was for reaction's sake. well it's true okay but I like to say that often to disturb her. but the way I answered nagor was like so...fast.
okay in case anyone in the right mind DOES for fact read this piece of trash called MY BLOG, please do not dismiss me as some nutcase who's utterly dysfunctional and unstable and a member of some gay and lesbian club or something okay. that is completely wrong. it's true that my radar for vril is like khairiah's radar for terrorist and joyce's previous radar for her hot pants (sheesh saw him AGAIN today) and eh same as my radar for eewei last time. I didn't think much of it honestly last time until I came to mjc and found people with the same sort of radar, but for guys. oh joy. like what's this supposed to mean?
no I am not les kae. whoever is reading this trash please don't get strange ideas. I don't mind gays and lesbians because it's not fair to discriminate them, but I don't encourage it and I don't really like the idea okay. relax. it's just my overtly female environment. hehhehx.
now the stupid computer auto restarted on me just now so I can't quite remember what I was originally screaming about. but anyway I'm back to screaming about miyavi. still the prettiest guy. but freakingly dysfunctional. hyde is also pretty pretty but terribly lucky. or rather, he's like the most fortunate and functional jrocker so far. the rest are all like broken and mental and everything but normal. ah whatever.
oh I remembered something I wanted to say earlier. I had this premonition/dream/idea that some idiot from 03s307 will someday read this trash I have here and spill to the class or something. so I'd better say something now that clarifies myself. it's true that I'm a little weird and eccentric sometimes, but if you know me you'll find that I'm damned routine and actually not that abnormal somehow. or at least that's what I think. most of the people around me always think there's something loose or even missing in my brain but hey I'm human okay. still the same as you...just how I express it.
ah stop here. no more mood to blog already. talking to vril online, blogging and having a headache and leg-ache is not
really much fun. yeah.
and it waits for you...@ 2206
MAY:
Stubborn and hard-hearted. Strong-willed and highly
motivated. Sharp
thoughts. Easily angered. Attracts others and loves
attention. Deep
feelings. Beautiful physically and mentally. Firm
Standpoint. Needs no
motivation. Easily consoled. Systematic (left
brain). Loves to dream. Strong
clairvoyance. Understanding. Sickness usually in
the ear and neck. Good
imagination. Good physical. Weak breathing. Loves
literature and the arts.
Loves traveling. Dislike being at home. Restless.
Not having many children.
Hardworking. High spirited. Spendthrift
What does your birth month say about you?
brought to you by Quizilla
just had to put this in. it's still 19th july. dragged this off yenn weii's blog. still don't understand why adibah doesn't like her. true there isn't anyone else in her batch to hate but...haiz. poor attitude child. but then again people I generally mix with have attitude problems. especially if they hail from tkg. oh yeah. try the bunch I ate at swensen's with. joanna, dorothy, jia ying (actually more slow than AP), vicky, and carr. just try that. woohoo. short of dibz though.
but if dibz went joanna wouldn't be there and vice versa. ah well.
still listening to itoshii hito! so nice!!!
19th July
gosh so many things have happened since the last time I blogged. or actually nothing much. watched truman show for
GP on saturday morning. it was really a nice show. I watched a wee bit, towards the end where christof nearly drowned
truman in the fake sea. it was pretty entertaining at times, especially when he realised that the citizens were going on
loop service around him and that all the cars were so superbly synchronised to stop him from leaving the city. and it was real cool when he told the audience at the last part, in case I don't see you again, good morning, good afternoon,
good evening and good night. woo hoo! so cool! it's like his ultimate way of saying goodbye, because he obviously would not be seeing anyone again...at least not on tv.
yesterday went for band fiesta. gosh we were like prawn's hate club members. all of us who actually went are like the
bunch she doesn't like. it's not the end, and it's not exhaustive, but usually we'd be the most unlikely candidates to be seen at botanical gardens just to watch the band. but we were there yesterday. oh yeah we were there. and in fact
we went back with the band. and yeah we went back really unscathed. finally. we stepped into tkg happily too. and we
ate swensens after that. as if I'd haven't had enough of swensens yet. I just had an earthquake with wee khee, crystal
and khairiah on thursday. sheesh. but anyway we had baked rice and apple crumble yesterday. apple crumble!! so nice!
I remember I ate it for the first time with clara and fiona and lots and lots of other people. there were like 8 of us
of so. it's so nice!!! someone was complaining that it was super sweet, but I remarked back that anything I recommend
is bound to get you high blood pressure or become a sort of diabetic. and carissa didn't help by adding that we told each other we would meet each other a few decades later in some NKF dialysis centre. so dumb right. oh yeah.
came home so late last night. luckily mum didn't kill me. I called back okay...I'm a good girl I am...hehehh that's from
my fair lady. pygmalion was one of the extracts for literature exam. and they stupidly went through the paper today but still no physical paper yet. some teachers haven't filled in the marginal comments. oh great. like when are those papers coming back at all??!! getting on my nerves.
and today was such a shit day. oh well it started really fine you know. the econs quiz that crystal was trying so hard to wriggle out of was today. and atlas actually won. oh my. it was so...lucky. callisto was obviously leading, when suddenly some genius in atlas could answer the last 2 questions right and suddenly we won! oh yay. and crystal just couldn't believe it. she was insistent that she get herself out of that quiz, especially when her econs is like F. but anyway violet said good job to her...
stupid violet. so irritating. first she said that the formula change in TVC/change in Q didn't exist, then she insisted
that average product was output/variable factor, when it is obviously total product/output. like duh. and sarah ee was in class and she just stared on. obviously violet was wrong. and either she learnt all these things from some other set of notes or she was wrong and didn't realise or she DID realise but doesn't want to apologise. either way it's bad. can she like check out exactly what we have been learning and then check our answers? it's true that we ought to read beyond the textbook and notes, but seriously, the formula for average product is worse than obvious. it's ultimately duh. arrgh.
so that was one spoiler. next spoiler was no lit papers came back. and a203 got their results already. after that, we
had super boring GP. okay not really super boring, since we were laughing at all the debaters for the SIA debating
competitions 2000. and natalie morris was one of the speakers for rjc. everyone was like hey isn't that the kids at work
girl? I tell you if she knows my class she'll feel so pleased that people really remember her.
then we went for lunch. pakcik ran out of stingray. aww. and somehow everything today was like super spicy. don't really know why. usually even with the stingray it isn't this bad. must be because there was no chicken. haiz. and we thought they had swopped math with pccg. obviously they hadn't. there was still math. and mr ng really went to change his wallpaper to legolas. *smack head* that guy is one hell of a nerve wreck and really entertaining and damn cute (cute in the sense really adorable ah...) but sometimes I think he's too nice to us. it's unsettling crystal and it's beginning to unsettle me too. and furthermore there were some idiots at the back of the lecture theatre purposely saying that they didn't understand when the stupid thing is so easy to understand and they are all out to waste time and bully him. hurrmph.
math tutorial was fine. duh it's mr ng. we made him go through the entire question 2 of the assignment and he was
like so sian after that. then we ended the day with chinese. sheesh. xie lao shi is just plain scary okay. really scary.
there's something wrong with that guy. I'm positive.
had this incredible premonition that I would see avril today after lunch. and guess what. I did. haha. poor child had
lunch at 1415 and has 2 hour chem revision lecture with dr raman. haiz. feel like calling her but she's probably not
home. even if she miraculously is, she'll be sleeping. so sian.
oh and I found a new favourite song!! oh my goodness I never thought that miyabi would ever write such a song. it's a
must hear for everyone out there who supports him. it's from his new single ashita, tenki ni naare. it's called itoshii
hito and he performed it at the beauti-fool fest 03! and the song was only released this year, 23rd june! and it is oh so
nice!!!! so sentimental sounding. haven't heard this sort of song for a very very very long time. really. very long time.
since now I've gotten a little tired of linkin park (finally) so I thought I'd try some old stuff. I found that I still love miyavi all the same. okay change. I still love pop is dead and I really still love joushou gaidou very much. I don't rightly know why but even though joushou gaidou seems like a really boring song, and terrible noisy, but I still like it a lot. who cares. I like it and that's that. but this new song itoshii hito is seriously nice. I can't wait for some kind soul out there to get the lyrics for this song romanised then I can sing with it. the only line I know is itoshii hito and it comes in at the chorus. and the part where he changes key is ultimate lovely. it sounds so good you know...even though honestly I wouldn't give such a song to miyavi to sing because seriously he's more like wailing than singing sorrowfully. but it's by miyavi...so whatever.
oh must save lots of money. must. I'm getting that lovely iPod that joanna has. goodness me it's prettier than I thought. okay if I don't manage to get the iPod, I still want an mp3 player. at the end of the year there'll be year end
sales and I shall get myself one! it's so super nice. can't stand it. I like the idea of an mp3 player much better than
a discman or an md player. it saves me a lot of trouble really. just store and transfer mp3s straight from my comp
to the player. or rather, the card thingy or stick or whatever the player uses for storage sake.
I'm getting an mp3 player! by hook or by crook...hehheh...
and it waits for you...@ 1808 (wah so early huh...for once)
14th July
I'm so tired. not tired physically so to speak, but more like tired of doing all this stuff. there's like so much time but
actually not really that much time to do PW, and the stupid deadlines are not significant to me. neither is the promo
date significant to me. so numb. arrgh. still have other things that I haven't done. I promised lydia and angela my
timetable but I haven't done it. must do. friday I'm seeing angie and must hand that in. and must do timeline for the
sportlympics thing. friday also.
is it me or is it linkin park? feeling more and more like sian and depressed and oblivious to everything else. perhaps it's a little of both. sigh. I've kept off lp for so long, only to revive it today. why? coz I saw vril. haha no lah. it isn't the first time I'm seeing her since I stopped the lp and it didn't revive. I don't know.
I've got this terrible muscle ache in my right leg. actually it's this terrible pain in my right body. from the neck down
to my butt. and that's sad. why? because tomorrow I have pe and it's conditioning. and I hate conditioning. I don't know what's their fascination with conditioning. I tried so hard to pass my dear napfa (puke) but it's still like that. I might as well have left it the same. I don't know. so sian.
stupid vril. hasn't come online yet. and I'm really sick of pw. it's so taboo. not that it's particularly difficult to do. it's particularly difficult to get to doing. it's so sickening you know, to have pathetic results. we're going to do surveys on saturday and I really hope that it'll be fine. if the results come out terrible, I simply have no more further comments. I have no problems with the idea of our project--it's quite nice really. it's just that the more unique and stranger the idea, the harder it is to find anything on it.
what an appropriate song now. easier to run. great. not that I suffer from great pain or emotional trauma, but rather that sometimes school is such a chore. there's so much to do and so much to expect, so much to think about and arrgh. there's little to look forward to and there's little time to just sit and lie back, think about life, think about what we've been doing, think further into the future...no time. zero. it's horrible. I love having time to myself. if it isn't to
myself, at least to my best friends, or fun friends. there's a reason why I didn't get up and go out of the lecture
theatre today. sup was like hey why are we still here? how to tell her? because I love being here with my cca friends
and talking rubbish even though sometimes it means that I have less time to do proper work at home. eldds meeting
ended at like 4 or so, but I only left the school at like 6 something. haiz.
it's faint now. can I faint now?
and it waits for you...@ 2339
12th July
so irritated now. I was fine initially. don't know what happened and don't really want to know. wait first I must
backtrack on stuffs I wanted to write about yesterday but didn't have the time and luxury to write.
yesterday went out with dibz carr and vick again. so nice. it's the four of us again. even though dibz was sick and I
didn't have enough money it was fine. at least we had some good food and fun time laughing. not as funny as the stupid coleslaw biological weapon theory but thank goodness it didn't come to that. I would have died at seoul garden if that happened again yesterday. after that we went for the tkgssb concert. oh gosh. couldn't believe it. we were going for a concert at 1700h. five o clock in the evening. what rubbish is loke-yeo thinking? rubbish lah! I just said it.
okay that was stupid. anyway it was such a great joke that the sky was so bright and it was still bright after the
entire concert and SO bright that we decided to go to the raffles city bk to grab a drink. wow.
hahaha I now know who to give the award for the best faker in the trombone section--siyue wins it hands down. actually not really the best faker. yuhan is the best. she really looks like she's playing but she's not. shujing was a good
one back in eupho but now they're both really good. but anyway back to that siyue. gosh her attitude sucks big time
but that's alright. waraphorn has a horrid attitude too but at least she bothers when there's a need to. and she can
play okay? that siyue is an utter disgrace. I don't have such a junior. I mentioned the super faking to wanting and she was like haha, didn't you know already?! yeah I knew but I didn't know it was THIS bad. shiqi and I had a real good laugh in our seats. shiqi had this real funny action of pulling her hands in different directions because that's exactly what siyue looked like in comparison to the rest of the section. in fact it's dumb to be lagging behind when you're in the
trombone section. ultimately dumb. why? because it's so obvious when you're faking the positions. especially when
there are soli parts. when the whole section is playing the same thing simultaneously, you'd better get it right. but
that girl obviously couldn't even be bothered to get those few soli parts right.
and there were no gimmicks. it's true that I really hated gimmicks because honestly it's tiring and taxing to think of and practise them thoroughly. high irritation level. but at least now I'm better. yesterday I was thinking of erupting at the backstage but decided against it.
oh and guess what, prawn wore the exact same thing that she's been wearing for all the concerts for as long as I was there. and that's like super funny! because it's as if she isn't rich enough or something to get something else. she can buy another black dress right? oh goodness everytime tkgssb has some formal performance or concert of some sort she'll wear that 2 piece black thing. but at least it doesn't have spider webs on it like wong mei ling.
haha. wong mei ling. I shall just copy and paste what I told avril just now.
how dumb. ??????????? ? says:
so funny today
how dumb. ??????????? ? says:
we were screaming about violet
how dumb. ??????????? ? says:
coz she freaked my fren out so badly this morning
avril says:
uh huh....
how dumb. ??????????? ? says:
then coz we talk abt violet we also talked abt wong mei ling
avril says:
den she heard?
avril says:
hahahaha
how dumb. ??????????? ? says:
then we were laughing coz some of my frens only noe her as
mistress overdone
how dumb. ??????????? ? says:
she didn't hear lah
how dumb. ??????????? ? says:
but the thing was that my gp tutor was like who's mistress
overdone
avril says:
uh huh......
how dumb. ??????????? ? says:
then my gp rep explained
how dumb. ??????????? ? says:
that mistress overdone is actually a mamasan in our
shakespeare text
how dumb. ??????????? ? says:
then my gp tutor raised an eyebrow
how dumb. ??????????? ? says:
and he didn't laugh
how dumb. ??????????? ? says:
then we asked him why not funny
how dumb. ??????????? ? says:
then he said, oh well...
how dumb. ??????????? ? says:
she's my boss you know
how dumb. ??????????? ? says:
then all of us laughed again
how dumb. ??????????? ? says:
coz the way he said it like very ke lian liddat
avril says:
hahahahahahahahaha
it was really dumb. and vril said her hair looked odd. ah well not that I want to see her. hahahaha. good morning! so
dumb.
yeah crystal and I stayed in school so long today. we were dismissed at 1555 today but crys wanted to do math so I
thought okay 20 min wouldn't kill. but then after we were done we went to the canteen and talked and talked to maril
and elaine and then we thought okae let's go home. but before we could step out, we passed the atrium and khairiah called us to stay...so we did. and we stayed until nearly 1800. oh my goodness. like I like school so much I stay an extra of 2 hours. hey but then again I saw vril. haha. my vril radar is superbly powerful. okay except for that day. I was really going crazy with those sickening stoppers that kept cracking or dropping or arrgh something. and I totally didn't hear avril call me at all. hmm. must go check radar. I think it's working again. it was quite good today.
haiz must find a day to call eewei. saw her yesterday too. I didn't expect her to be there. she didn't tell me. I mean
she's going to get out of prawn's way real fast. and I mean REAL fast. not that she's scared of her anymore, but it
brings along lots of trouble. don't know what's wrong with that blind prawn.
oh the only thing that wasn't blind about her was vera. oh man vera was good. although she did gabbra at some points
and kinda squeaked a lot, but she was good for a sec 3 who has to stand right in front and play the solo for the entire
song. but I'm surprised she gave shauna only one pathetic solo. how sad. but I don't pity her. somehow I never did like
shauna's face. not that she really offended me in particular, but you know me. I don't like your face means that it's just
too bad.
what else was I going to say? I don't remember anymore. all I know is that it's been a really long long long entry and I'm feeling a little better now. just tired.
oh yah. I'm sick. shit.
and it waits for you...@ 2255
6th July
so pms today. since morning. I was like this zombiefied idiot and cursing the stupid pe dept for making me run like early in the morning on the first proper day of the term.
oh joy. passed math. people will bash me for it. so I decided to really try to shut up about it. and I'm kinda feeling sick now so I will shut up.
I wanted to blog so much yesterday, but it was late and the comp wasn't on so...yeah. why I wanted to blog? well when I decide to blog there are 2 reasons. or rather 2 moods. one is that I'm superbly happy, and the other is that I'm
incredibly moody. seldom do I blog when I'm in between. and when I do it's very obvious. just watch for the kinda
short entries. those are the ones.
back to yesterday. backtrack. I was freakingly happy yesterday. and pretty good mood on saturday. backtrack
even further. saturday was syf opening ceremony. so fun to be back with my dearest friends carissa dibz and vicky. I
realise I've talked about it already. but that was merely an account of what happened. now it's the underneath. why
was I happy? because they could identify with me! yeah about the new society we're all in. do tkgians live in
another world and culture? or at least do the ones I know live in this other strange world where we give don't give
2 shits about guys and fashion and where cracking lame jokes is our livelihood and we get real kicks and have lots of fun throwing eggs at people? I don't know. maybe. now in our new environments our jokes fall flat, people don't respond the way they ought to and suddenly we feel mean, evil and sadistic. we start to say things like aw don't be so mean and care for things that are pink and say that everything about other people is cute and nice and acceptable. oh
sheesh. what a horrid place we're in! and I thought it was this mjc thing. carr's in tp and t. yifang's in tpjc. it's the same. vick's in vjc and she's feeling the effects. I don't really know. wee khee and khairiah and joyce are always saying that crystal's mean and evil. but honestly, she's perfectly fine to me. in fact I miss such people.
don't cry. it's not worth it.
I will get through jc without scars. I will. I will find my bunch. I will. I will pass my jc, get promoted and will find fun in school again. I will. I will pass my project work and get it over and done with. I will. I will.
okay. stop the emotion dam. it sucks. swing to the other extreme. why was I happy yesterday. oh yeah. it's not so much that I went out with sister. of course I love going out with sister. that's somebody I really love very much. but also that I went out with somebody else I love too. hehheh yeah I went to watch spidey II with sister and avril. somehow mae didn't seem the spidey type (better confirm, in case she actually is!) otherwise it will be like the gathering of people I love...
and adam has just dropped this BIG bomb that his birthday is on the 9th. oh joy right? like what the heck am I going to do about it??!! haiz. I love that guy too, even though I don't really treat him as a guy so to speak.
enough. I'm in the mood to blog but this is it. too distracting and too...disturbed. I told you I hate my emotion dam. especially when it decides to leak. I don't really recall it bursting ever, so let it leak. at least if it just leaks then the probability of it bursting due to overload is lowered. right? never mind.
and it waits for you...@ 2319
3rd July
finally get to blog. it's been terribly long. and the exams are finally over. even though crystal believes that it's false freedom but who cares. I know it's really false but never mind. I'm feeling happy.
after the paper I went to far east with crystal khairiah and wee khee...so funny. we were going with wee khee to
buy something slightly formal for a school concert at night, and she actually bought a pair of berms just because it wasn't denim so therefore more formal. I just cannot see any logic in that. it wasn't really that funny that wee khee felt berms wasn't really informal; the funniest part was when danny turned up, and khairiah asked him what he was wearing. he told us that he's just wearing some shirt and bottoms. so khairiah asked him what bottoms, and he said shorts!!!! and he had this really like then-what-else-do-you-expect kind of face! so funny! we couldn't stop laughing. really couldn't stop. wee khee was so pissed. but never mind lah. all friends right? hahahhahaa.....
then today so crazy...went for the syf opening ceremony. gatecrashed with a bunch of primary school kids, acting
like we were their relief teacher, but honestly that couldn't have been possible due to the fact that adibah is seriously too short and she and vicky were in vj uniform. carissa was in berms and I was in jeans. like all totally wrong. but nevertheless, we got in and actually made it to the grandstand! hahahhaha! and all that without that prawn's help. she offered dibz to follow her and sit in the grandstand...but of course adibah wouldn't want to. goodness me. carissa would rather get struck by lightning by not sitting under the grandstand than sit with her. and I kinda agree. hehheh.
but anyway at the end...tks won. hahhahahaha. although bowen was really really good. they must have been real
angry that they didn't win the last time and worked really really hard. but...too bad. I went all the way to national stadium to support tks anyway. so my stand doesn't really change. hahaha. but bowen ended their repertoire with numb!! so cool. if only concert bands played stuffs like that. but then again it will never happen and I'm no longer in band. oh yeah. liberty.
okay it's getting kinda late and I'm not in the really really blogging mood. I've been giving an account today. it's just that I haven't blogged for so long due to my exams and so I decided that I must say something today. oh and also I must upload my dear kyo this month. cannot shortchange him too much. oh yeah upload now!
and it waits for you...@ 0028